36 year in review

2019. 36.

What a year.

My birthday goals for that year were to continue building myself up and to find things which would make me happy. That, I did.

Sadly, I wasn’t able to find a new theme song for that year, though it didn’t really seem I needed one. Double-chai (18 + 18 = 36) is auspicious enough that it seems I was really lucky already.

Work Narrative

Canvassing

I started 36 in Richmond, CA. East Bay, near San Francisco. I had just gotten hired with a fundraising company. The interview I had prior, with a home health care company, ran absurdly late, and I was late to my interview with the company. Luckily, I’m weird enough that they wanted to talk with me when I checked in late at the front desk.

The interview was fun, and I was hired. Obviously, I mean, I spoiled that in the prior sentence.

My interview was 3/25, I believe. My hire date was 3/27.

I started off as a canvasser for Amnesty International, but I needed to change charities when I learned of some underlying moral conflicts they had with my beliefs. Basically, they’re antisemitic as fuck. I don’t mess around with that, and I don’t have the energy for it. Sadly, much of the Bay Area is really antisemitic. I have never run into so many problems as I have there.

That said, the company I worked for (worked, past tense, because they terminated my position during the covid-19 pandemic) was pretty good and opened up a different charity in the Bay for me, Heifer International. Heifer is freaking great. I loved canvassing for them.

I worked as a door to door and street canvasser, raising monthy funds for these charities. I got to meet some incredible people who came to the Bay to help train us. Most of the people who came were significantly younger, in their early or mid 20s, but they were incredibly capable, bright, and empathetic. This company was really great at finding quality talent.

My teammate, Mark, is basically one of the greatest guys ever. He has a rich, intriguing story full of heartbreak and triumph, and he was the best street fundraising companion I could have asked for. He was only 20 when we met, but we got along famously. We both made supervisory positions the same week, and that was done with both of us helping each other. We hired some really great people, but sadly lost them when the rigors of the job were too much for them.

Canvassing isn’t easy, but it’s hell of a lot less easy to burn out on that than insurance.

The company needed a supervisor in Seattle, and Jalisa wanted a position there, so that’s where we headed in November.

I started off as a street fundraiser for Covenant House, a homeless youth transitional services provider. We moved to a door to door campaign. It was interesting and fun. My immediate boss, Divina, is an incredible woman. We recruited and trained a few people whom I’ve grown close to. During this shut down, I miss working with them.

Insurance

Through no fault of my own or Kimi, the transition of selling my book of business to her was incredibly rough. To this day, we still don’t know how complete that has been. It’s frustrating.

All that said, it’s nice to have been done, as I’ve been able to take a remote producing position with her during the pandemic. It should result in a decent amount of income while I go to school and it’s flexible enough that I don’t have to worry about making up school hours.

School Narrative

I’ve been tired of making crap money and working crap jobs for a while. I’m not that fond of insurance any more, but I still love helping people. Canvassing is much the same — I like the cause but the hours and wear on my body isn’t worth the pay.

Jalisa helped me realize that physical therapist assistant training might be a good route for me, and after a lot of reasearch I fell in love with the idea. It ticks all the boxes of what I want in a job and nicely ties together a lot of the skills I’ve learned in the past, namely massage therapy, communications, and customer service.

The biggest irony is that I enrolled in a Tucson based school (Pima Medical Institute [PMI]) in Seattle, after moving to Seattle from Tucson. It’s an irony only I seem to enjoy, but I get enough enjoyment out of it for everyone.

I started the enrollment process in late 2019, around December 23 or so, and started January 27.

Classes are interesting and my instructors are great. My classmates are a wonderful group of people. I miss them terribly during the lockdown.

What’s really frustrating for me is there is no way to know when we’ll be able to go back to school. We might need to take an incomplete for the semester if we can’t take the final, because the final needs to be in person for accreditation purposes. Another hiccough is we had to move everything online, and I don’t really learn this kind of material well online. I’m lucky enough to have massage school and years of anatomy and physiology schooling under my belt, but many of my classmates don’t. I’m struggling enough, even with that history, and I am genuinely worried for my classmates.

All that said, I’m currently maintaining straight As about 2/3ds of the way through the first semester. I hope I can make honors. Next semester is going to be an intense one with a number of difficult classes, namely pathology.

Hiking Narrative

Hiking near the Bay was pretty nice. There were a lot of ticks (ick) which is a lot different, and potentially more dangerous, than the fleas of San Diego. Luckily plenty of flea and tick medication is cheap, accessible, and super effective. There are few things so wonderful as watching a tick try to latch to one of our beloved dogs, then fall off and start dying when the medication hits. It’s beautiful.

Cache Creek

For my birthday hike (a week late, 4/6), we went to Cache Creek Wilderness. It was gorgeous, and we were the only two people we saw for two days. There was a couple we ran into on the way in, but after that it was incredible solitude.

Rye did great, Mia did great, Gatsby stayed at home with our landlord.

We tried to do a trail called the Cowboy Camp Loop, but we lost the trail at a really poorly marked area. We went up and back over a bunch of areas, including some overgrown, soggy ground that was likely closed to foot traffic, and just couldn’t find a damn trail! We ended up turning back so as not to lose our light, and went and set up camp where we started. And it was just gorgeous.

Rye started to become really good off leash, and he started to become somewhat trustworthy.

It was really fun the last day when he ran off and came back after we hollered at him to return. He came trotting back with his pack on and a dumb smile on his big old face.

One of the most compelling things about Cache Creek was the isolation. There’s a beauty in being able to just absoltely disappear only an hour from civilization. No people, no pollution, no noise. Just us. Hell, the first day was warm enough we were able to strip down after setting up camp and didn’t need to worry about being seen. That’s isolation!

Tahoe Rim Trail

This is probably one of the things I’m most proud of, and I’m still working on documenting my experience.

There was at least a year of living and growth  packed into those two months. Between the successes and struggles, the beauty and fear, and just embracing so much self afflicted suffering, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to sufficiently say what it did for me.

We started planning this trip in earnest in January of 2017 with the leader of a San Diego dog hiking group, Shannon. Shannon, Jalisa, and I had been talking about this since 2016, though. We all wanted to do a thru hike with the dogs and the TRT is completely dog friendly.

The crew: Shannon and Travis, with Cappie the vizsla; Jalisa and Eddie, with Rye the German shorthaired pointer and Mia the chorkie.

The destination: South Lake Tahoe all around Lake Tahoe with a stop in Tahoe City, back to South Lake Tahoe. Clockwise.

The first day was one of the most amazing days. Rye became, truly, my trail dog. He would run ahead, wait in the shade for us, and then go ahead. If we took too long, he’d come back and check on us. He made friends with a Girl Scout troop, he relaxed at Star Lake, and he accompanied me while I took a dump (well off trail and with a 6+” cathole, Leave No Trace, baby!). It’s the best feeling to have a trail dog, and Rye is a great one.

Shannon, Travis, and Jalisa had to get off trail the fourth day due to all the dogs getting injured. It was heartbreaking but necessary. We didn’t go all the way out there to bail, so I soldiered on as the crew found accomodations and recalibrated.

We were in Desolation Wilderness, one of the most incredible landscapes I’ve seen, when the decision was made to split. We had picked up a lone hiker, Forrest, the day before, and some of Travis’ friends joined for a couple nights, at that section. They all went on that morning while I accompanied the crew and the dogs back to the water taxi that services Echo Lake, where we were. That added about four miles to my trek that day and set me back about three hours.

I had lost the trail so badly near Lake Susie that I had to have a day hiker show me where it went. Honestly, that was a lot of fun. I went off trail up the side of a mountain trying to find the trail, and it was something I never thought I’d be able to do. The conversation and random camaraderie of the people who I talked to was a pleasant relief, and getting back on track felt wonderful. 

After that I had to cross Dick’s Pass, and I lost the trail due to the snow and the fact that I was so green in those conditions.

 That was an exhilarating, terrifying, triumphant, 25 mile day. And I made it. I fucking made it as the sun was going down. I was alone going on exposed trails with 1,000+ foot drop offs, crossing the top of a mountain pass with snow that could dump me down the side, and a fear of heights that was tamed by determination and trekking poles.

The temp-crew went to the campsite and waiting…and worried. Because I was wearing an aloha shirt, they assumed I was Hawaiian and asked a bunch of people who went by if they saw me. A few had, but most hadn’t.

I rolled in about 30 minutes before sunset, enthralled and relieved. And with massive chafing.

Forrest and I finished the first half of the trail, to Tahoe City, alone, after the temporary crew took off according to all their own plans.

I took a zero day at Tahoe City. We took Mia to the vet for a cough. We all found dog sitters for the critters. We resupplied, reconfigured our pack loads, drank and ate a good bit, celebrated my completion of the first half, and we set off the next day for the second half.

We completed the second half together. It was wonderful.

One night, Travis and I sat up and watched the Milky Way rise over Lake Tahoe. I took my first successful timelapse photo series over that night.

There were a number of wonderful moments: battling mountain bikers, 16 mile water carries, wonderful campsites. But I’ll recount those later.

At the end, on the final half mile, everyone let me go ahead so I could pull us all in and fully complete the trail. It meant the world to me.

 Intermission.

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I really could go on and on about the TRT, and I will eventually. There’s so much that happened. I want to finish covering my year, though.

Yosemite

 We went to Yosemite a number of times. The first time was right when the snow started melting, so the rivers were swollen and the waterfalls were brimming with massive energy. The second time we went things were tamer.

We stayed at tent campsites, at a semi-permanent structured camp shelter (Housekeeping Camp), and at Camp Curry, which was a heated tent cabin.

We hiked up to the top of El Capitan, we saw Bridalveil Falls a few times, we overlooked Glacier Point.

We kayaked in Tenaya Lake on Jalisa’s birthday.

Honestly the emotional intensity of Yosemite, like the Rim Trail, deserves its own post and I’ll have to do that when I can devote the focus to it.

Vignettes: general stuff

I really was glad to get out of the Bay. I met some great people there, but I also met a lot of atrocious people.

Jalisa and I got to see Hamilton! It was just stunning. I got to see it also with my friend Sarah, who is just a great person all around.

I got to catch up with a friend from high school and someone who helped get me into photography, Bella. I forgot how fun it was to hang out with her.

I met a person, Emilie, who is outdoorsy and has become someone I can talk with randomly. She moved to Portland, OR shortly before we left for Seattle.

We found some really great restaurants in the Bay, namely Uncle Wong’s, Los Moles, H. Salt Fish and Chips, and Richmond Pizza House.

We found some incredible breweries in the Bay, my favorite was Armistice Brewery and Anchor (yes, that one).

I found a few fun karaoke spots, but nothing worth naming outright.

We had a few fun little trails in Wildcat Canyon near where we lived.

Rye loved eating the tomatoes off the plants in our backyard.

The dogs got skunked a few times.

The synagogues in East Bay kind of sucked, but the ones in SF proper were rad and amazing.

Piedmont is full of a bunch of rich assholes who have no hearts.

We walked across the Bay Bridge, and it was exhilarating.

The food scene is ridiculous, though the Mexican food is lacking, all the other culinary regions are well represented.

While it’s dog friendly there, it’s not as dog friendly as they want you to believe.

The tech scene is overwhelming while the humanitarian work is uplifting.

 The hospitals generally take really good care of their nurses. 

Fog is beautiful or annoying. Sometimes both. Depends on the day.

Dolphins and whales can pop up out of nowhere.

Alcatraz is an experience.

 




Tahoe Rim Trail (TRT), Part 1

It was about four hours into the hike when I started to scratch the surface of why I wanted to do it.

Jalisa got me into backpacking about six months after we met. I had always been interested in backpacking, but I was never able to explore it due to various circumstances. We hiked Mt Wrightstown, outside of Tucson, with the dogs, and camped in Baldy Saddle. I used a duck canvas backpack from the 70s or 80s, Jalisa used a nylon blend one from the 80s or 90s. The gear we had was heavy, the tent was unreliable, but the trip was amazing.

After that, she introduced me to the idea of thru-hiking, trekking from one point to another. It was an idea I was immediately enamored with. Up until that trip hiking was always a day hike. Something you drive to and back from, a single event to be conquered in a short period of time. I enjoyed being in nature, but day hiking was too rough on my brain. Driving out somewhere would inevitably trigger my vision problems, and then I’d be useless when getting back in town. Plus, so much can be done in the time you have to take to go there and back, and then clean up after.

Yes, I enjoy hiking, but day hikes often felt more like a burden than a joy.

Backpacking was just the answer. Having the opportunity to get out and sleep out there would reset my vision, take me away from the painful and exhausting triggers that slow me down, and let me get truly immersed in the experience. I wouldn’t be sucked away into the stress of screwing up my face or my eyes just to try and focus on something. I wouldn’t have the all-too-familiar moment of sitting in the car and feeling my eyes stop working properly in tandem.

Day 0

We went up to Tahoe City the day before so we could do some water drops in areas where we wouldn’t have streams to refill from. We also did a little exploring, but nothing extraordinary.

The day ended in the city of South Lake Tahoe at a Motel 6 (dog friendly!). Shannon, Travis, Jalisa, and I went to get pizza, beer, and wine at a local spot.

Day 1

We met around 8 am at Kingsbury South Trailhead in Nevada, just outside of Heavenly Nevada, a well known ski lodge. We got started around 8:45 or so, and headed off to Armstrong pass. Star Lake would be our first little stop, and we took off with the zeal only new thru-hikers on their first inexperienced day could have.

A few hours into the hike is when I had my first moment on how magical this would be for me.

Since getting him, Rye has never been able to be an off-leash dog. His prey drive is far too high and he gets into the chasing tunnel too easily to be recalled. But this…this was different. After a few hours on trail I was able to let him off. He would run ahead to a shaded area and wait for us, then run ahead to the next one. When I needed to break, he would come back and check on me and wait with me.

We ran into a troupe of girl scouts who were going to go camping at Star Lake. Rye greeted them, gave all of them doggie love, and then followed us along. He also gave me the distinct pleasure of demonstrating how to property bury dog poop, in front of them, but that’s just how it goes.

For the first time in two years, Rye was a proper trail dog, and we might be able to move to a tent style that doesn’t require poles.

We got to Star Lake and it was gorgeous. Truly resplendent. I’ve never seen anything like it. Granted, much of it is probably due to the context of a warm hike and the euphoria of watching my dog evolve into a critter I can actually trust.

 Rye at Star Lake

We took about a half hour break there: cooled off our feet, refilled our water, and let the dogs rest and play. After that we were off again.

Somewhere along the way, Jalisa and I stopped to rest and Travis and Shannon continued on. We wouldn’t see them until later that evening, when we made camp.

We went along, chatting, enjoying the day, and started losing daylight after crossing the Freel Peak trailhead. This put us in the shadow of the mountain, and we hadn’t seen Travis or Shannon for a few hours.

Sometime just before the golden hour, we ran into three women who thru-hike together. They did the John Muir Trail (JMT) the year prior, and had set out to do the TRT when we did. We were all on day 1. They advised us that the stream we met them at was the last one for a while, and if we were going to refill, to do it there.

That ended up being solid advice. We took 10 minutes to refill, since worrying compounds exponentially. It was enough to worry about finding our friends before dark, setting up camp, and hopefully not hiking in the dark; throwing water on top of that possible predicament was just unnecessary.

Armstrong Pass was just a mile or two ahead. Our friends were faithfully waiting for us, though they were starting to fret a little on when we’d show up.

We scouted around to find the least buggy area, set up camp, and had our first dinners on the trail.

The dogs were tired, our legs were invigorated, we were set. Day 1 was complete. And I was hooked. 




The Problem with Ilhan Omar

Two Jews, three opinions.

Jewish proverb

Many people in the Ilhan controvery are citing that because some Jewish people didn’t take offense, that it’s not a problem.

We, as Jews, have a long history of maintaining our own opinions, holding others’ opinions in mind, and settling on a third more neutral position. So just because one Jewish person says it’s a problem and another says it’s not doesn’t mean the situation is zero sum. It just means we have a much larger discussion to have.

Speaking of discussions:

…I want to talk about the political influence in this country that says it is okay for people to push for allegiance to a foreign country.

Ilhan Omar

There is a long-standing anti-Semitic trope that Jewish people have a dual loyalty, that we would put the good of Israel before the good of the US. It’s similar to the trope that drove the US government to wrongfully imprison almost 120,000 Japanese people in WWII. The idea is that these people aren’t actually loyal to the United States, so they must be stopped.

Loyalty is not a zero sum game. Ask any immigrant what they want for their home country and for the US. Ask the children of immigrants what they want for the countries of their heritage.

They all want the same thing: the best leadership as per their world view. Naturalized immigrants in the US and their children born here want the same thing that anyone else wants: a healthy home country.

Coded Anti-Semitic Tropes

Anti-Semitism has been around for thousands of years. During those thousands of years many anti-Semitic stereotypes have become rote.

The most common and persistent one is that Jews have a proclivity to control money. This shows up in literature, in media, and in general conversation. The writer Alexander Dumas, in The Three Musketeers, wrote:

Well, then, off to the nearest goldsmith’s, and sell that diamond for the highest price you can get from him. However much of a Jew he may be, he will give you at least eight hundred pistoles.

This attitude is still so pervasive that “Jew” has become a dysphemism for “haggling”. I personally experienced this while on a cruise ship and a family next to me started bragging about how they “jewed them down” referring to some jewelry merchants at the last port.

Another anti-Jewish trope is that we have split loyalties. That we would sell out the US for Israel. Language of this can be seen in many places, most recently and notably from Rep. Omar. This started before The Protocols of the Elders of Zion was published, and persists to this day.

The only way I can prove that we have no dual loyalty, and that we do not have an impulse to protect Jewry above whatever land we live in, is to cite “dina d’malkhuta dina (??????? ????????????? ???????)“, which means “the law of the land is the law”. It’s an edict issued, as far as I can tell, around 180 CE to reinforce that Halakha (Jewish law) does not supercede secular law in the country one lives in. This goes further to even give secular law preferential treatment to religious law in many cases.

One other outdated anti-Semitic stereotype which mostly faded in the 70s is that Jews have horns, much like most depictions of the Christian Satan. This stems from a misunderstanding of an old Torah verse where Moses was radiant after speaking with G-d. Basically, the word for “radiant” can also mean “horned”.

This image was used for about 400 years to paint Jews as having been allied with Satan. Satan, in Judaism, is not a being or an entity. Satan, in Judaism, is not horned, nor corporeal. In Jewish tradition, satan is simply “the evil impulse”. It’s the mean voice inside everyone.

There are too many tropes to list, from baking Christian children into our matzoh to organ harvesting Haitians. A fairly inclusive list can be found on Wikipedia.

What This has to do with Rep. Omar

In 2012 Ilhan Omar tweeted

“Israel has hypnotized the world, may Allah awaken the people and help them see the evil doings of Israel.”

This said that Israel and its supporters were forcefully tricking the world into supporting it, restating the ancient trope of false loyalty to our home country.

She apologized. And if she had left her use of loaded and coded anti-Semitic language at that, it would have been fine. However, in February, She tweeted a now-deleted tweet:

It’s all about the Benjamins baby ? https://t.co/KatcXJnZLV— Ilhan Omar (@IlhanMN) February 10, 2019

“Benjamins” refers to $100 bills, which feature the face of Benjamin Franklin. This is a pop-culture reference to saying that something is corrupted by money.

When Batya Ungar-Sargon asked Re. Omar, on Twitter, to what she was referring, she replied “AIPAC.”

AIPAC is the American Israel Public Affairs Commitee. It’s a lobbying group which aims to strengthen the US-Israel alliance. It doesn’t aim to undermine the US, only to bolster mutual interests of the two countries.

What does Israel have to do with the US?

Israel is a strategic area in the Middle East. It is basically the Silicone Valley of the region. They have numerous climate change and humanitarian progams underway, including advanced desalination studies and technology, medicinal studies, and innumeral consumer goods innovation.

If you’ve ever used a USB thumb drive, that’s an Israeli invention. If you’ve ever used a personal computer, the first CPU was designed in Israel.

There’s a lot that Israel contributes to the world, all of which helps not just the US, but the world at large. From ongoing cancer treatments to making clean water, Israel is a critical piece of humanity in the world.

In addition to their scientific prowess, Israel is also the only country in the Middle Easy which guarantees LGBT rights, abortion access, and women’s rights. Women aged 20-33 have free access to abortion, regardless of their circumstances. Transgender people have access to support under Israeli healthcare, too. There are some problems with the current transgender support and many advocates are working on it, but it’s still better than what the US has and far better than anything else in the region.

Israel is, by and large, a haven for humanity in the Middle East.

A (Very) Brief Background of Israel and Palestine

Israel has a long standing problem with Palestine.

Since Israel was established as the only Jewish state in the world in 1948 it has undergone many changes. Most notably, the border expanded in a series of wars started from outlying countries. These wars were started by outside aggressors and Israel took land to strengthen their border security.

When I talk about border security here, it’s about protecting people in a small space of land. It’s not equivalent to the 2000 mile US/Mexico border. This is about protecting a country from militant people, not from economic migrants.

There are two areas most contested right now: the Gaza Strip (Gaza) and the West Bank. Vox wrote a really comprensive article about this here if you wish to have the entire back story.

West Bank

The West Bank is loosely controlled by the Palestinian Authority and is arguably under Israeli occupation. Israel maintains that the West Bank is a disputed territory, the Palestinian Authority maintains the land is rightfully theirs. Regardless, there are Israeli troops stationed in the West Bank working to restrict Palestinian activities. There are also Israeli settlers who are making Jewish settlements.

The Palestinian Authority recognizes Israel’s right to exist. In addition, many countries recognize the Palestinian Authority as a valid government.

Gaza

The Gaza Strip is controlled by Hamas. Hamas was elected to run Gaza in 2006. It is an acronym of ?arakat al-Muq?wamah al-?Isl?miyyah. It’s an Arabic word meaning “zealotry” and a Hebrew word meaning “violence”. They are a fundamentalist Islamic group.

Hamas has a short term goal of “libertaing Palestine” which includes taking all of Israel and turning it to a Sunni Islamic state. They have a longer goal of creating an Islamic state spanning from the Jordan River to the Mediterranean.

Hamas is known for taking international aid and using it to build primitive missiles. They launch these missiles from schools and other civiliant areas so that any preemptive or retalitory action will hurt children or other vulnerable targets. They fire these missiles into civilian areas, like markets and neighborhoods.

Hamas is classified as a terrorist organization by Canada, the US, Israel, Japan, the EU, Jordan, and even Egypt. The only major foreign countries who ally with Hamas are Russia, Turkey, and China.

The charter of Hamas is deeply anti-Semitic, outright calling for the destruction of Israel

‘Israel will exist and will continue to exist until Islam will obliterate it, just as it obliterated others before it.’ (Preamble)

‘The day the enemies usurp part of Moslem land, Jihad becomes the individual duty of every Moslem. In the face of the Jews’ usurpation, it is compulsory that the banner of Jihad be raised.’ (Article 15)

It even goes so far as to undermine and invalidate any peace initiative.

‘[Peace] initiatives, and so-called peaceful solutions and international conferences are in contradiction to the principles of the Islamic Resistance Movement… Those conferences are no more than a means to appoint the infidels as arbitrators in the lands of Islam… There is no solution for the Palestinian problem except by Jihad. Initiatives, proposals and international conferences are but a waste of time, an exercise in futility.’ (Article 13)

To free Palestine, as so many Leftist people want, would be to see the literal destruction of all Jews in Israel. It would be to destroy Israel as a country. It would be to sentence every LGBT person, every Jew, every Christian, every atheist, every non Sunni Muslim in the region to death. Remember, Hamas is a fundementalist organization — not Muslim, but Muslim fundamentalist. It would be like arming the Westboro Baptist Church and letting them install their own religious law in the US.

Where Rep. Ilhan and Leftists Take Umbrage

Leftists equate the ongoing arguable occupation of the West Bank with the atrocities of Hamas. As such, they have created movements like BDS (Boycott Divest Sanction) and Free Palestine.

Leftists also seem to believe that since Hamas was democratically elected, they are a legitimate government. However, they don’t see that Hamas is diametrically opposed to every Leftist ideal. Whether it’s toward peace, women’s rights, religious liberty, freedom of the press, or any number of ideals, Hamas exists for one reason: to kill Jewish people and destroy Israel.

The West Bank and Gaza are two extremely different situations with extremely different nuances.

The West Bank wants to find a way to coexist with Israel.

Gaza, via Hamas, does not want to coexist. They are opposed to coexistence.

These two situations get conflated.

Israel has the backing of the US and some incredible technology at their side. Because of this, they’re able to defent themselves against multiple threats. They are not perfect, but they are a valid democracy and they do have checks and balances. Just like any major government they can always do better, but they aren’t the fascist regime many leftists make them out to be.

Because Leftists have a propensity to side with seemingly oppressed people, a propensity which I admire and laud, the Palestinian narrative is easy to latch on to. It’s a seductive narrative: a group of people have been pushed out of land, they’ve been blocked off from most aid, their motion is hindered and tracked, and their people are often killed. All of this is done by a supposed bully country with technology eons past theirs. What’s not to love? It’s the foundation for so many hero-saves-the-day  movies.

The problem is that it’s not the case. Yes, Israel has forced people out. It’s because it was established as a historical homeland for displaced Jews after World War II. Israel has been attacked on Judaism’s holiest day, Yom Kippur. Israel has suffered incursions from all sides. Still, they do what they can to limit civilian deaths and injury. They’ve offered aid to Hamas before, and they continue to offer aid to the residents of Gaza. They put their own civilians at risk when they hold back from firing at Hamas missle sites next to schools and hospitals.

The Real Problem

The vast, vast majority of people in the Middle East want a two-state solution for Israel and Palestine. This means they want an Israel and a Palestine. A one state solution would be one territory gobbling up the other.

With Hamas fervently opposing peace talks and Leftists and Democratic party members lining up with Hamas, a two state solution becomes less and less likely.

People should be able to criticize a government. This is not something I’ll ever argue on. The problem is that many leftists, such as Rep. Omar, use loaded, coded anti-Semitic language which demonstrates a prejudice toward the people they’re criticizing.

Here is Omar’s full quote

What I’m fearful of — because Rashida [Tlaib] and I are Muslim — that a lot of our Jewish colleagues, a lot of our constituents, a lot of our allies, go to thinking that everything we say about Israel to be anti-Semitic because we are Muslim. And so to me, it’s something that becomes designed to end the debate because you get in this space of — yes, I know what intolerance looks like and I’m sensitive when someone says, “The words you used, Ilhan, are resemblance [sic] of intolerance.” And I am cautious of that and I feel pained by that.

But it’s almost as if, every single time we say something regardless of what it is we say that is supposed to be about foreign policy or engagement or advocacy about ending oppression or the freeing of every human life and wanting dignity, we get to be labeled something, and that ends the discussion. Because we end up defending that and nobody ever gets to have the broader debate of what is happening with Palestine. So for me, I want to talk about the political influence in this country that says it is okay for people to push for allegiance to a foreign country.

In the very first line she talks about how she’s afraid that because she and Rep. Tlaib are Muslim, they’ll be scrutinized as having ulterior motives, the very thing they are accusing Jewish people of.

Leftists accuse Israel of wanton human rights violations, of gleeful land grabs, and of intentional misuses of power. They accuse the Jewish people of duplicity, of power grabs, and of racism. The problem is that coded languge of “corruption” or “allegiance” or “power” or “influence” has been used so often for so many thousands of years, along with ideas that Israel shouldn’t defend itself against threats, that this criticism metamorphoses into flat out anti-Jewish thought.

In fact, even just the words “Free Palestine” line up with two movements. One which is sponsored by Syria and opposes the existence of Israel, the other which is based in California and seeks to empower Gaza, which would see to the destruction of Israel.

People have a right to criticize Israel just as they have a right to criticize the US or Amazon or Guy Fieri’s Palace of Mediocre Caloric Junk. They have to learn to temper it with language that doesn’t threaten the existence of the people living in that region. They need to learn the institutions they put their trust in, just like Conservatives with Trump, may not be as aligned as they initially thought.




Moving On


If you’ve visited any of my sites before, you’ll know that I love life. I’m adventurous, trusting, and formidably optimistic. I love people, I love art, and I love living.

The time has come for me to give up owning an insurance agency. Marketing and operating remotely just isn’t feasible. I’m not able to represent the standards I need for my company, alone.

I have sold my book of business to Everything Insurance, and my good friend Kimi.

Why This Change?

Owning an agency requires a level of access which lies opposite of travel. There are things in my life today and moving forward which are just not compatible with agency ownership.

For instance, my girlfriend introduced me to backpacking in late 2017. It ignited a love of camping and the outdoors which had laid dormant in me since I was a pre-teenager. We are hiking the Tahoe Rim Trail this July, which will require at least two weeks of absence from regular life.

I’d love to hike the Pacific Crest Trail and the Arizona Trail, and those are just not feasible while owning an agency.

Aside from that, I have become burnt out with the day to day minutiae of agency ownership. It’s difficult, and often gets in the way of my passion of helping people.

I Won’t Let Knowledge Go To Waste

I can’t let what I know go to waste, though. I need to keep helping people.

I’ve learned more about the insurance industry than I have about almost anything else. It truly is my area of expertise.

This is why I have taken a producer role with Everything Insurance. It allows me to consult with clients, such as you and everyone else I’ve written. It also allows Kimi and her team to handle accounts, changes, and claims when I’m not available.

Insurance is about taking your goals and dreams, taking what you have worked for and what you continue to work for, and protecting it. It’s about setting yourself up for success and being made whole again when something goes wrong. With this change, I’m excited to embody and demonstrate those very values and ideas.

Thank You

Thank you for your trust, past, present, and continued. Allying with Kimi will surpass all service I’ve given, and I’m excited for it.

Thank you for your time, and your business. Thank you for this journey and for this next evolution. Just as I paired each of you with insurance carriers to fit your needs, you have helped me meet mine.

If you need anything and don’t have my cell number, reach out here and I’ll give it to you. I’ll always be your advocate.





D’var Torah: Vayechi 5779

Vayechi 5779
December 22, 2018
Genesis 47:28-50:26

The last time I spoke about Vayechi was in Tucson, Arizona, at Congregation Bet Shalom. I talked about how despite our multitude of tribes, we had more accountability to each other than we ever had before. That the blessings Israel gave to Ephraim and Manasseh affected each tribe of our people. Those blessings did not dilute with time nor distance, rather they multiplied through generations as the numbers of our tribes increased.

This is especially poignant for me today, though I am reading Vayechi through a different lens. Today’s lesson, for me, is colored by the past two years since I last presented this parashah to a congregation.

Ivan and Rabbi Meltzer gave me the honor of today’s drash as a thank you note for my time here.

I’m Eddie, and I’ve been in San Diego since August. My girlfriend, Jalisa, is a travel nurse, and she’s been gracious to have brought me along with her as she travels the country on her assignments. We’ve spent the last year in Southern California, first in Palm Springs, then El Centro, and finally here, in San Diego. When we arrived here I had no idea how deeply I’d fall in love with this city and with this synagogue. I even already had a connection to Ohr Shalom — I photographed your Torah covers for the woman who created them. She’s from my home town of Tucson.

Our time here in San Diego is ending the first week in January, and I am going to miss you all. We’ve had l’chaims, laughs, and tears. We’ve shared triumphs and trauma. I feel closer to this synagogue and so many of you than I have felt with a community in years. For this I cannot thank you enough.

The relationships I’ve made here, the friendships, the ideas, and the love I’ve felt with this impending departure is what is coloring my interpretation of this parashah today. Vayechi is about the death of Yaakov while being titled “and he lived”, and this speaks to me today.

Looking at Torah is never straightforward for me. I’ve always looked at it like studying poetry. We see what we want to see. It’s often influenced by others, by circumstances, be knowledge and science, or any other factor that feeds into our mind and our heart.

I feel what we pull out of Torah reflects on us and what we need more than it reflects on anything else. We say that Torah is truth, and the biggest truth is what we see looking back at us, in the mirror.

Today we read about Jacob preparing his family for his death and his final plan. His desire is to be buried in the graveyard his predecessors made. He doesn’t want to be buried in the place he made home in his later years, but to be with his emotional and spiritual origins.

There’s a lot that plays into this, as his death and the blessings he gives are directly related to many events that lead up to it. He continues the theme of the younger child receiving the larger blessing, as he had done when he supposedly tricked his father in his youth. He condones and condemns the actions of his children. All of these are tied into previous parashot and many events stemming from this event are covered in later portions.

Jacob was a man who was uprooted, who thought he lost his favorite son, who was betrayed by his other children, and who got what he missed most back. He was a man who relocated to help his family and his community. Jacob suffered immensely and ended up springing a nation of people who were that much more prepared for the hardship of the world.

What inspires me and gives me hope every time I read this is that it’s called “and he lived” as he dies. The most notable part of Vayechi, for me, is that Jacob dies. And Torah always makes a deal out of distinguishing Israel from Jacob.

Of course there’s the basic scholarly view: Yaakov or Jacob’s name is what dies. When he works or acts in the interests of the future tribes or for Hashem, he is called Israel. Jacob dies. Israel doesn’t. Oddly, it’s also Jacob who blesses his children, whose descendents will become Israel. Perhaps it’s because blessing ourselves is a faux pas. Perhaps it’s because it’s the father’s duty to bless his children. I think it’s because Jacob, as a man who helped put the material world in the hands of the scholars rather than the plunderers, as a man who brought nuance to what was originally a straightforward dissemination of birthrights, was especially qualified to perceive how his progeny would take up their roles in the world.

Today is the end of many things. It’s the end of the book Bereshit, it’s the end of Jacob, and it’s the end of my time here at Ohr Shalom. While each son of Jacob plays a different role in the nation of Israel, each of you has touched me in a different way. There is not one person here I have not learned from. There is not one person here I have not enjoyed the company of.

My prayer this Shabbat is that while my time here, as this book, and this forefather ends, the impact you’ve had on me will live and flourish. That you and I have been mutually inspired and enriched. I hope and pray that when we part ways, we are all better for our interactions and clearer on our paths in this world.

Ohr Shalom, and every person here, thank you for becoming my tribe and thank you for being wonderful. Shabbat shalom.